When I think of false nails I think of girls getting dolled up for a night, a special occasion and then drag queens. So when I was approached by Fashion North’s Beauty Editor, Megan Fife, for a video project that included guys attempting them for the first time, I was up for it!
As the time came to wear them I was a bit apprehensive that I was going to glue my fingers together as I’m not the best with fiddly things; that was my main worry about getting them on. Especially when I once witnessed my flatmate glue all her fingers together on one hand while attempting this!
My nails arrived and, out of the three guys that opted to do this, I got the longest nails, which I learnt are better known as stiletto nails, that resembled something Adele would wear.
I managed to apply them with no issues other than they weren’t perfectly straight which did annoy me a little. When you first apply nails you really appreciate your natural nails because you feel as if your fingertips are being suffocated. Then you realise you have to do the other hand and all the profanities you know fly through your head and it takes you 10 times longer to do than the first set.
Once they’re all on though it’s a different story. At first they’re a bit like braces; you’re very aware they’re there, you act very careful as to not cause yourself any pain, and any involuntary actions you do cause you surprise pain! After the first hour though you get used to them and learn to adapt.
I was challenged with peeling a banana, removing my phone and wallet from my pockets, taking my credit card out and also tweeting. Removing the banana peel was easy, as was the wallet task. Sending a tweet, however, was not.
Sat here for @canvasmaguk with false nails on for a video
— Elliott (@MinMaximalist) March 21, 2016
While there are no typos in the tweet (thanks autocorrect) it did take me at least a good minute to type and send it when it would take seconds usually. Using the base of your thumbs is just not an option when you have stiletto nails on! The side of the thumb is where it’s at and even then the accuracy is appalling.
Once I went back to my daily routine things didn’t really get any better. Buttoning up a shirt was impossible. The nails blocked my view and I couldn’t even grab the buttons. Safe to say it was a mess and my short temper kicked in and I got angry.
When it comes to eating though, the nails came in handy. I could easily pick things up with them and they became like miniature chopsticks. Getting food stuck under them though, not pleasant!
I couldn’t even type with them on, if you know what Peter Griffin looks like when wearing acrylic nails then you can imagine what I looked like. I eventually started using the nails to press keys but that just cause more pain as it strained the glue on my real nails.
By the time I took them off, only one nail had come off a few times which was easily reapplied with leftover glue but other than that they lasted until I took them off.
Overall, false nails look pretty good and but would definitely look better done by professionals. They’re a lot of hassle and create difficulty in the simplest of tasks. So people who know how to do these tasks while wearing false nails, especially long ones, deserve credit because it takes some skill.
